Baring my soul

5/31/17:

My life has completely and forever been changed since just over six (6) months ago; the week before Christmas 2016. 

I feel compelled to figure out how to condense the messes and messages of my entire life (58 yrs in Sept.), thus far, into a relatively short - but densely packed plea to all who read this blog. The message? Choose to live life more abundantly! Live it to the fullest possible measure. Live up to everything that God Himself has gifted and equipped you to do. Settle for no less, and make no excuses for portions of your purpose yet left unfulfilled; get up from wherever you are, and go on; go forward - Do it now; Go!

Saturday - December 17th, 2016

I am calling a friend who just left my place not 60 seconds ago, and I am telling her... Come back now! I need you to take me to the hospital. Please hurry. I had held a very successful yard sale that day, and had been in the midst of some pretty radical life shifting plans. I was going to be moving out of my place, and heading back out into my US tour, to do photography, after already having toured all but four (4) US states. I had decided that things in Pensacola were moving too slowly, and I needed to do something about it, so I was going to leave the following Monday, and tour the rest of Florida, as a starting point, and then let time tell me what to do next. I had become quite restless with the passing of time, and the relentless daily reminders that I am not getting any younger.

My friend drives - on a good day, like a bat; straight out of hell, so having heard the urgency in my voice, I had barely stopped speaking when she had already pulled back up in front of my door. 
Now, Having an unearthly high tolerance to pain, the fact that I would have rated the pain in my head at a twelve or more, had already made me understand - this is not good! This is very, Very... not good!  So, as my friend drove/flew me to the hospital, the only thing I knew to do - to stay focused on hope, was to talk to God; Help me Jesus... Help me Jesus... Help me Jesus, was all that I said the whole trip. Then, all at once; we were at Sacred Heart, and I was being wheeled in.  I was thrust onto a gurney,  and my clothes were being stripped off; while a barrage of questions were being asked of me. All-the-while, all that I could do was repeat, Help me Jesus... Please, Help me !?  I would have thought that I was speaking very loudly, but it turns out that my voice was barely audible. An ER doctor tried to comfort me, saying; don't worry sweet-heart, we are going to help you.

With an almost annoyed inner frustration, I recall grousing to myself, something to the effect of: Get off the line!!! I'm not talking to you! I knew in my heart of hearts that the help I needed was going to have to come from a source much higher than the plain on which I had lived my life thus far. 

Don't get me wrong; I have loved God with every fiber of my being since I was 19 years old; I have loved Him more than my next breath, and would have been terrified to have lived it apart from Him, but... I had for most of my life, done things most  of the time, without first checking in with him on the good or bad; the right or wrong of a thing.

Now, here I was, having six (6) years earlier - left an abusive marriage; a jealous and controlling husband, and having traveled - one day at a time doing my photography, and keeping the roof over my head; day, by day, by day, by day. The stress of all of this had lead me to the day I was now in. It had lead me to the most earnest - gutt wrenching cry out to my God for His help - ever.  Even though, to doctors ears, it was no more than a week and barely audible plea.

To God, I believe it must have brought out a hallelujah chorus. I imagine singing that probably went on into the wee hours of the night, in sheer joy, that I had at last, come to the understanding, that my own efforts, done my own way; had only lead me to where I was. I had an enlarged and muscular heart from too many years of high blood pressure;  and a severe bleed on the brain, from having strained it trying to understand everything, and figure it all out. 
To say that I have always been a type-A personality is the understatement of all time. I have been a full blown - grade A super-freaking; over-thinker.

By rights, I should be, on this sunshiny, perfect day - sitting in a wheelchair, being fed, bathed and dressed by others; that is, if I was even alive to tell the story to anyone at all. Instead, from the very first day after my hemorrhagic stroke to the right occipital lobe  I have been a living, breathing, walking, miracle. 

The first day, after the stroke, when the friend who drove me to the hospital came in - I could hear and understand everything she said, but... she had no head! She is a nurse, so I would later learn why, but when she asked me how I was feeling, I just stared at her through the fog over my eyes, and said... RoxAne! You have no head!?  

But, I could think; speak, follow orders, chew and swallow food, etc. Granted - my head hurt like I was being continuously beaten with a bat, I was partially blind, and light hurt so bad that I became the terrible patient that no nurse wants.  I was constantly complaining - could someone please turn the light off!? Finally, on abut the third day, the nurse got brave enough to explain to me that the light, was coming from the window. Wow! Did I ever feel silly.

As time has gone by - I have learned - in no uncertain terms that I don't have to go it alone in life; with, or without a spouse. I don't have to figure it all out for myself. What it all comes down to, in the end; is thist... Jesus not only hears our cries for help, He not only cares; but He was and is there - to help us when we call.

Best of all - all of the years of doing things my way, have not been wasted. I have learned so much. More than anything else - I have learned how NOT to do things. I am no less a type A personality, than I have ever been. I am still an over-thinker, but; my heart, mind, and spirit have softened. They have opened up to a bigger hope, and to greater possibilities than I ever even imagined before. I have become so grateful for the extended life that I have been given that I have lost (in six months) over 37lbs, so far. I have gotten in better shape than I have ever been in my entire adult life, and it is hilarious to me, how many whistles and horns I have been getting of late. Not that I am looking for another man. God no!!! I want to live the life He has - for me!!! Whatever it looks like. I want that for you too! 

My earnest prayer is for Gods very best for you all!; All of it, nothing held back, nothing left out!!!

Even so-be-it! Amen.

Fort Barrancas and Fort Pickens: Tunnels and Mythology

Disclaimor: While I am not personally a "Paranormal Investigator", nor am I one who will be found lurking around in dark places, hoping for an other-worldly experience; I do however assert that, to believe there is a God, necessitates believing in the devil, if for no other reason than, that God says there is one. Therefore, with no further analysis of whether the "Paranormal encounters" are ghosts, or demons - I offer the following accounts, as Pensacola historical lore - for the lack of a better way to encapsulate the subject, and please be sure to rejoin us on June 15th, for the continuance of the subject of Pensacolas Underground Tunnels:

Fort Barrancas was designed by Joseph Gilbert Totten, and connected to the Spanish-built water-battery by an underground walkway tunnel. Major William Henry Chase supervised that construction,

Spanning a centuries long history, the U.S. Army deactivated Fort Barrancas on April 15, 1947. Then, after a restoration project from 1971-1980, 
Fort Barrancas was then opened to the public.

There is a great deal of historical information about Fort Barrancas readily available, for anyone who wants it, and for those who wish to study Florida history itself. You can find this information by following this link https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fort_Barrancas

For those, however, who wish to have the stories of the Fort Barrancas' underground tunnel happenings  unearthed (pun intended), then follow along with me, as I share with you the accounts of local lore, myth, fable, and unexplainable fact?

Join me now as we begin:

on Facebook page: http://www.ghostaugustine.com/blog/news-events/a-ghostly-experience-at-fort-barrancas-in-pensacola-fl/ if we block out the world around us, and any of our immediate surroundings, and allow ourselves to be translated to the experiential account of self proclaimed paranormal investigator,  Jaimie Roush, whose blog post titled :A ghostly experience at for barrancas - in Pensacola, FL., describes meeting a confederate soldier in a tunnel ....

As I was making my way to St. Francisville, Louisiana I decided to stop in Pensacola and check out Fort Barrancas. I checked in through the gift shop and learned I would have the fort to myself. They had just opened for the day and no one was out there. I thought, fantastic! This way I can really feel the history of the fort. A ghostly encounter never even crossed my mind.
Fort Barrancas sits on a bluff overlooking Pensacola Bay and the location inspired engineers of three nations to build forts here through the years. The British built the Royal Navy Redoubt here in 1763, the Spanish built two forts here sometime around 1797 then, American engineers remodeled the battery in 1840.

I was touring every square inch of the fort and found a narrow stair case that descended below ground, and then went through a tunnel, up a set of stairs that open up into this long hallway that went both to the left and the right. It has a very strange feel, the barometric pressure dropped drastically. I felt kind of creeped out which is not normal for me. I went down the steps, through the tunnel, then back up the steps and out of the fort.  As I stood outside to ground myself I started thinking, if it’s haunted, it can’t hurt me. Besides, I have been a paranormal investigator for over 12 years so what the heck am I scared of?

Next, please join me as we continue to ponder the part of Pensacola's history that takes us underground:

Fort Pickens: history - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fort_Pickens

As told by the writer of "History & Haunting of:
Fort Pickens,Santa Rosa Island , Pensacola, Florida" found on Facebook page called: History Haunted
on Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/historyhaunted/posts/1009159279110152

Geronimo, a noted Apache war chief, was imprisoned in Fort Pickens, along with several of his warriors. 

"I had some friends that were not enlisted in the Navy and they did some ghost hunting on the side. They were not an organized group per se, but if they found a public spot that had strange stories about it they would break out the cameras and tape recorders and try to prove or disprove the stories.", says the writer of this FB page. Read more of their story by clicking above.

Be sure to come back and join us June 15th, as we continue our tour of Pensaolas Underground Tunnels.

Congratulations Kathryn Louise Green Wilson:

 

of Springdale Title - Pensacola FL who has already become a My Pensacola Family and Friends community Facebook Page SUPERSTAR!

In no small part, due to her active, and ongoing efforts in engaging herself in our all new community page. IN ITS FIRST WEEK. Kathy has already rated our page, shared, liked, and given thumbs ups to not only posts about her own business, but also on the posts about others. Her friendly manner, and others oriented mindset, has gotten lots of positive feedback on the post we shared about Springdale Title - Pensacola FL , as well as likes and shares from her friends, in fact, to date, she has already had a mind-numbingly high number of people reached by our May 16th posting; 1,420 reached, to be exact. That has to be some king of record. Please join me in congratulating her for her well deserved honor and commendation.

The Pensacola Tunnels: Well Known, Little Known, and Largely Unknown

Did you know that there are a series of underground tunnels in Pensacola, Florida, which were built for military purposes, and which largely remain in-tact today? What if I were to tell you that I have it on credible authority, that there is even one such tunnel underneath Palafox Road?  This particular tunnel was built so that our military would be able to travel by vehicle safely from point A to B. Would you be further interested in knowing where those points are, and whether that particular tunnel remains in-tac?  Or, is it now submerged underwater? Would you potentially, be even further intrigued to learn about the legend of a ghost said to be living in a tunnel, under Fort Barrancas? If so, be sure to check in on this blog weekly, (beginning the 1st Monday  in June) as this segment of Pensacola's legends, and history, unfolds for all who are interested to know, and for those who are already in-the-know. Seeya again soon! 

Would you like the chance at getting the FREE gift certificate of your choice at a local Pensacola restaurant? All it takes is for you to LIKE/FOLLOW this page. You are then entered EVERY TWO WEEKS (1st and 15th) to win. Your name will be entered EVERY TIME names are drawn - unless or until you unlike or unfollow us :( and seriously, who would do that!?

Beginning June 1st - WINNERS DRAWN GET TO CHOOSE FROM THE FOLLOWING RESTAURANTS GIFT CERTIFICATES:

El Paso Mexican Grill https://www.facebook.com/pages/El-Paso-Mexican-Grill/141820802995750
PoFolks https://www.facebook.com/pofolkspensacola/
Wild Honey Frozen Yogurt https://www.facebook.com/wildhoneyfroyo/
The Egg & I https://www.facebook.com/The-Egg-I-Restaurants-15214190014…/
Cheddars Scratch Kitchen https://www.facebook.com/Cheddars-Scratch-Kitchen-65097010…/
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With the Pensacola Fresh Blog, I hope to be able to peek the interest of lifelong Pensacola locals, as well as the short term visitors, and transplants alike. As it develops and takes shape, I look forward to becoming a frequent quick stop for any and everyone in Pensacola, regardless of the time spent among us. I am going to earnestly invest myself in learning (and sharing) everything that there is to know about the town that I have come to love, as well as all that makes it great and causes it to stand out from anywhere-else USA.

Don't look here, however for the bad and the ugly, instead you will find here only the good, the interesting, the inspirational and the uplifting. I would genuinely love, Love, LOVE to get emails from my readers, with contributions to-that-end. There is certain to be an immense wealth of information and trivia in all of you, and I can't wait to hear from you, and then pass your knowledge of Pensacola along. 

Whether you have knowledge of the historic, or the present days; from the sublime to the ridiculous; it is all a part of what makes Pensacola so great. So then... to get the ball rolling, I offer the following short quiz, to test your personal expertise on all things Pensacola. 

Be sure to let us know how you did. 

http://www.funtrivia.com/playquiz/quiz2706561efcb08.html

Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/PensacolaBloggerFla/

Facebook: MyPensacolaFamilyandFriends  

Twitter:PensacolaFreshhttp://www.twitter.com/pensacolafresh

In my genuine desire to come to know as many of the fine people of Pensacola as possible, I have now begun creating a variety of social media pages, so that I can begin  an ongoing dialog with you. Please go to these pages and post to me, and my followers about all of the things in Pensacola that interest, and inspire you. I look forward to talking with you very soon, and often.

PS - This blog and all of the social media pages being so new on the scene; I will need your engagement in this process, for it to become the growing community of genuine Pensacola Family and Friends, that I know it can be. Please be sure to tell your friends both about this blog, and the new social media experiment in expansion of  the Pensacola social scene - through Social Media. - Thanks!

The following story was relayed to me by Dr. David Conkle - The founder and administrator of the Saint Joseph Clinic of Pensacola; when he viewed the attached photography taken by myself in 2016 (follow this link - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NUz_SoZd2xY to learn more about Dr. Conkle, who is himself, a remarkable man, who I am deeply honored to know.

The cross at Fort Pickens Road,a Pensacola Beach landmark, is said to have been the location of the first religious ceremony in the United States. There, a Catholic Mass celebrated the Assumption of Mary, on  August 15, 1559.  Known as the Island Cross,  it stands  10-foot high, and is made of  concrete.  Along with the dune upon which it rests, it has survived every hurricane since it was set in place on the road to Fort Pickens Historic Military Fort/National Park. Many local residents are known to ascribe divine protection to its longevity amidst all of life's storms. 

I for one, see it as an inspirational reminder of God's perpetual presence in the lives of His own. Who doesn't need to be reminded of that regularly, in the day and times in which we now  live?

- D. Mullis

Coming Full Circle

My family moved away from Florida in 1962;  I was only 3 years old at the time. On July 17th, of 2016, I came home again, and now, a full 54 years have breezed by in the blink of an eye; I have, it seems, come full circle. 

With my grown twins now fully engaged in walking through all of the stages of life, that I have already come through, it has recently occurred to me that I too, have a full life to be lived -- and its just within my reach. I find myself all-at-once inspired, refreshed, and reinvigorated,  by all that I am learning and experiencing of the home-sweet-home, that my parents took the family, and left behind, so long ago. They made their choices, based on the times and situations in which they lived. Now I am making my own choices in the new season of life that I am in, based upon the life that I have lived, and all that it has now brought me to.  Divorce is always painful - it should be; still, there really are no do-overs in life. There is however, the ability in us all, to do better with what is ahead, than we did with what is now behind us. 

As I am now moving forward,  I am doing so with great hope and anticipation, as well as eyes-wide-opened; in part due to the lessons learned in bygone years. Yes, I have heard be-careful-out-there, no few times, from friends who express concern for my adventurous nature; and who likely think me to be somewhat naive, to the ways of the world for a newly single again  woman who still turns her fair share of heads, for someone so ancient as I.  Still, so long as my health and inner drive remain intact, I see no reason to allow all that can be frightening, or ominous in the world in which we live, to drown out all that is charming, and good.

In the short time that I have now lived in Pensacola, I have had the opportunity, (as a photographer) to go on no few treks, in search of the bright, the beautiful and the inspiring here, and I doubt that it will surprise many, that I have found no shortage of things to revel in.

Please don't misunderstand me, I have no allusions that I am the first to become so completely enamored by Pensacola, Florida, nor do I intend, with this blog to try to "educate" its lifetime residents, about its glorious grandeur. What I do intend, is to offer up my own fresh perspective, as someone who now finds herself looking at all that Pensacola holds, with fresh new eyes;  much like the toddler who picks up, and inspects every single thing on the ground, and thoroughly inspects it; if for no other reason than, that everything is so close to her eye-level that she sees things others would miss. I find that even having now been here for nearly a year, everything old here - is still very new to me; at my eye level.